Imagine...if you can....not having a conscience, none at all, no feelings of guilt or remorse no matter what you do, no limiting sense of concern for the well-being of strangers, friends, or even family members. Imagine no struggles with shame, not a single one in your whole life, no matter what kind of selfish, lazy, harmful, or immoral action you had taken. And pretend that the concept of responsibility is unknown to you, except as a burden others seem to accept without question, like gullible fools. Now add to this strange fantasy the ability to conceal from other people that your psychological makeup is radically different from theirs. Since everyone simply assumes that conscience is universal among human beings, hiding the fact that you are conscience-free is nearly effortless. You are not held back from any of your desires by guilt or shame, and you are never confronted by others for your cold-bloodedness. The ice water in your veins is so bizarre, so completely outside of their personal experience, that they seldom even guess at your condition. In other words you are completely free of internal restraints, and your unhampered liberty to do just as you please, with no pangs of conscience, is conveniently invisible to the world. You can do anything at all, and still your strange advantage over the majority of people who are kept in line by their consciences, will most likely remain undisclosed...."~ From the book, "The Sociopath Next Door", by Martha Stout, Ph.d....
If you are here....you have the ability to love...and that is God's most precious gift to us. It will bring salve to your aching heart and your battered soul, for nothing is as life altering, nor as devastating, as being the victim of the soul destroying Narcissist, Psychopath, or Sociopath.
I've been a child and partner of pathological individuals.
I am presently 16 months out from my last relationship with one who has no conscience, no ability to love. The last one left who is so toxic. I am walking this journey with you. You may not be where I am, you may be in the beginning, you may be somewhere in the middle, but with healing, we are never entirely finished learning and growing..it is a lifetime endeavor. It is infinite..
I've created this blog as a method of personal catharsis. If it so resonates with you, and you find empowerment on your own journey and growing your ability to love, then I am tremendously blessed. Maybe we will heal together.
So the journey continues.....
